If I Had Known

If I had known

you were there,

I would have stopped my mind from spinning

around all the narratives

for the past 54 years.

I would have been the daughter

I didn’t know you wanted to have.

If I had known better

in my prison of lies

would that have been possible?

It was so long ago,

so it’s too late

to dwell on such things now.

What’s past is past,

what’s done is done.

If I had known lies somewhere

with water under the bridge.

I hope to see you brighter now

because you are still here,

loving me as you would have

54 years ago.

I see you differently,

as Papa,

a shining star where it was once

a dark hole in my life.

a hole once shrouded

with the pain of prickly narratives.

A hole where you are now here

and where I am your forever Angel.

-Laurie Perrone

Poetry